Do the motions of life get to you sometimes?
Welp. They do for me. At this moment of time that is. Living for the sake of living gets quite boring when you don’t have things that truly feed your soul.
I’ve always been a jack of all trades. Everything I try always results to a decent level of competence. So its difficult for me to pick a certain thing and run with it for the long run.
All my life I ran with one dream – practising law, and now that I realised it was merely the whole pressure of trying to figure out who you are and what you want to be as a child. That it was merely a perception of whats right in society’s eyes, its like starting from the ground up.
I hate feeling lost. Ive done a lot of soul searching before and luckily theres a part of me that reassures me that theres no place I need to be but here to learn what I need to learn. It doesn’t shake the fact that I’m still feeling pretty helpless floating in the abyss of things trying to do whatever to try and get my life on track.
I wouldn’t even know where to start. Theres a vast amount of subjects I’m intereted in, but I’m not interested in getting myself in even more debt with university unless I’m certain I need it to move forward.
How do people even expect kids to get this right when they’re in school?! I’m 22 and I’m still figuring it out.
I do get the impression that whatever I’ll be involved in, it will be an evolving career where I don’t just stay behind a cubicle and waste away 6 days a week 9 – 5. What kind of life is that? I see those people and they look miserable. And I already went crazy so I’m not interested in being taken back to the mad house, thankyouverymuch.
I watched an interview with Mark Cuban once and he said soon in the future it will be degrees like philosophy and creative subjects where the worth will be, as everything will most likely be automated by machines. That makes sense to me. Soon machines will be programmed to do just about anything. But what they can’t do is imitate soul or passion. At least artists and creative people will finally get a break.
I’ve always admired creative people. I love the beauty and the talent they create with their bare hands. To vision something and bring it to life is a blessed thing. Thats why whenever I come across another soul who is stuck in between a crossroad between doing what money gets and what their passion gives them. I would always advise passion. The money will always follow you if you choose your inner greatness and talent.
I know I’ve gone on quite the tangent but its because if I had one of those God given talents atleast I would have some sort of direction right now. Because I’d be able to take my own advice. But like I said, being a jack of all trades its kinda difficult to take a name out of the hat so to speak.
The thing I think I have to do is just carry on floating, trying out anything that comes my way. The universe has a funny way of bringing you back home to where you need to be. So I’m going to have faith in that.
Gotta keep the inner flame alive. If theres one job we gotta keep working for, its keeping our spirit aflame. What else would we be here for?
Not being miserable and empty thats for sure.